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OFF THE WALL.....
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Hmmmm...Allen wrenches? The world might have been better off without Mr. Allen's invention. When using them, or just looking for them in among your tools---don't you sometimes just feel....hexed?
The ones you find are always your small set when you need your big set---or vice versa! They are usually too short for any kind of leverage or "torque." If your set is a "standard" gauge, what you'll really need is a "metric" gauge. If you find the correct set, the right wrench will be missing.
At my house, I thought we were "Allen wrench poor," but when we need them, we can't find them. Maybe they're hiding somewhere!
I have a story for you--- so get yourself a diet Pepsi and some nachos, and settle down for a few minutes if you have time! A few months ago, my cool and comfortable mesh office chair with the springy supportive back--the one I sit in to write--broke. Something POPPED while I was leaning back and pondering. After much effort I managed to contact the warranty department of Acme Office Supply (we'll call them.) It took four months, but the big, heavy, under-the-seat repair part eventually arrived here with instructions.
Looking at the instructions (and being severely "mechanically-challenged,") I realized that it was beyond me. Thus after consulting my neighbor, who is a highly skilled plumber; my yard man, who is very talented in everything; my two sons, who are both skilled carpenters (hobby), my youngest son said: "I don't know, but maybe if I had a heavy-duty Allen wrench, I could try to fix this."
TA-DUM! It hit me like a blow in the gut! This meant I had to go into the hot 105˚ garage and do the dreaded thing: look for Allen wrenches. It was the Fourth of July. I wanted ice cream! But I went up one side the garage and down the other; went through tool boxes A, B, and C, looked everywhere, and just as I figured. Those Allens that I bought and put in a special place---well, I forgot the place! I was wrung out and hot.
My dear wife, who wanted that chair fixed and out of the way, decided to help. She, not having the slightest idea of what an Allen wrench looked like, even after a description, headed out into the hot garage to find the elusive wrench. I was eating ice cream and cooling off, and she came in and said: (holding up a Crescent wrench) "Is this an Allen wrench?" "No," I said. Back she came five minutes later (holding up Channel-Lok pliers) "Is this one?" Then, of all things (and don't you just love women!? I do.), she came in and held up a miniature socket set, and said proudly: "I know I've got one now!!!
Realizing that if this didn't stop, I would have a half day's work putting up the wrong tools tomorrow (women don't "put up" tools, you know), if she didn't quit. I said sweetly: "It's okay Honey, you'll never find the Allens. Let it go! Have some ice cream! Cool off."
Finally, I just phoned our office supply where we bought the chair (and also a duplicate chair), and said to the manager: "The part came from your warehouse in Alabama and how 'bout if I just drop it off over at your store and let your "chair assembler specialist" slap it on for me?" Now you have to know that the good old USA custom of doing anything for a customer is just about gone, and I feared he would say: "I'll have to call India or Pakistan first," but instead he said, "ER, OK, drop it off over here, I guess."
We left the chair there and a couple of days later I received a call from a man named "Eddie" (we'll call him.) Eddie was an unhappy "chair fixer." "Your chair is ready, but who over here accepted this chair for repair anyway? I don't FIX chairs---I just assemble them. This repair part was heavy and I had to get a partner here to hold on while we twisted and turned ...and it took over an hour!"
And he went on: "It was made in China and they must have used a heavy-duty impact wrench and it took a big Allen wrench which we just happened to have---and the thing was so tight, you should see the palm of my right hand---it is bruised and blue. The torque was terrible!"
Eddie helped load the chair into the car, all the while showing us his bruised and blue hand, caused by that OLD ALLEN WRENCH! Hey, I know, Eddie, I hate those things too!
So, you see what I mean. Allen wrenches just cause trouble!
Oh, I know, we'll go buy some more.
And lose them too.
OFF THE WALL.....
*************************
Hmmmm...Allen wrenches? The world might have been better off without Mr. Allen's invention. When using them, or just looking for them in among your tools---don't you sometimes just feel....hexed?
The ones you find are always your small set when you need your big set---or vice versa! They are usually too short for any kind of leverage or "torque." If your set is a "standard" gauge, what you'll really need is a "metric" gauge. If you find the correct set, the right wrench will be missing.
At my house, I thought we were "Allen wrench poor," but when we need them, we can't find them. Maybe they're hiding somewhere!
I have a story for you--- so get yourself a diet Pepsi and some nachos, and settle down for a few minutes if you have time! A few months ago, my cool and comfortable mesh office chair with the springy supportive back--the one I sit in to write--broke. Something POPPED while I was leaning back and pondering. After much effort I managed to contact the warranty department of Acme Office Supply (we'll call them.) It took four months, but the big, heavy, under-the-seat repair part eventually arrived here with instructions.
Looking at the instructions (and being severely "mechanically-challenged,") I realized that it was beyond me. Thus after consulting my neighbor, who is a highly skilled plumber; my yard man, who is very talented in everything; my two sons, who are both skilled carpenters (hobby), my youngest son said: "I don't know, but maybe if I had a heavy-duty Allen wrench, I could try to fix this."
TA-DUM! It hit me like a blow in the gut! This meant I had to go into the hot 105˚ garage and do the dreaded thing: look for Allen wrenches. It was the Fourth of July. I wanted ice cream! But I went up one side the garage and down the other; went through tool boxes A, B, and C, looked everywhere, and just as I figured. Those Allens that I bought and put in a special place---well, I forgot the place! I was wrung out and hot.
My dear wife, who wanted that chair fixed and out of the way, decided to help. She, not having the slightest idea of what an Allen wrench looked like, even after a description, headed out into the hot garage to find the elusive wrench. I was eating ice cream and cooling off, and she came in and said: (holding up a Crescent wrench) "Is this an Allen wrench?" "No," I said. Back she came five minutes later (holding up Channel-Lok pliers) "Is this one?" Then, of all things (and don't you just love women!? I do.), she came in and held up a miniature socket set, and said proudly: "I know I've got one now!!!
Realizing that if this didn't stop, I would have a half day's work putting up the wrong tools tomorrow (women don't "put up" tools, you know), if she didn't quit. I said sweetly: "It's okay Honey, you'll never find the Allens. Let it go! Have some ice cream! Cool off."
Finally, I just phoned our office supply where we bought the chair (and also a duplicate chair), and said to the manager: "The part came from your warehouse in Alabama and how 'bout if I just drop it off over at your store and let your "chair assembler specialist" slap it on for me?" Now you have to know that the good old USA custom of doing anything for a customer is just about gone, and I feared he would say: "I'll have to call India or Pakistan first," but instead he said, "ER, OK, drop it off over here, I guess."
We left the chair there and a couple of days later I received a call from a man named "Eddie" (we'll call him.) Eddie was an unhappy "chair fixer." "Your chair is ready, but who over here accepted this chair for repair anyway? I don't FIX chairs---I just assemble them. This repair part was heavy and I had to get a partner here to hold on while we twisted and turned ...and it took over an hour!"
And he went on: "It was made in China and they must have used a heavy-duty impact wrench and it took a big Allen wrench which we just happened to have---and the thing was so tight, you should see the palm of my right hand---it is bruised and blue. The torque was terrible!"
Eddie helped load the chair into the car, all the while showing us his bruised and blue hand, caused by that OLD ALLEN WRENCH! Hey, I know, Eddie, I hate those things too!
So, you see what I mean. Allen wrenches just cause trouble!
Oh, I know, we'll go buy some more.
And lose them too.
********30********
BY MIL
7-12-12
Sent from my iPad
I was wondering why nobody could figure out how to fix that chair while we were down there! Haha
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